kimi raikkonen « F1 Troll

Hello, World! Again!

I apologize for not posting in awhile. This happened for two reasons:

Moved. From one place to another.
F1’s currently horrible state put me into a motorsport-based depression. And a loss of motivation to write. AT ALL.

I’m sorry I have failed you. But I am back again. In my depression, I became so enraged by what I [...]

2009 Grand Prix of Italy Review – Pope Miracles Podium for Kimi

The tifosi prayed for a podium spot, and the Prancing Horse granted them a miracled, channeled down from the heavens through the pope, and into Hamilton’s brain.

Wow does the Ferrari suck. lol I mean seriously. Adrian Sutil was catching Kimi Raikkonen. The previous sentence makes no sense.

Anyone else notice Liuzzi didn’t challenge Hamilton? And people [...]

I’m hoping for a 1988 repeat. Fast McLarens get stupid. Ferrari 1-2. In honor of the fallen. In 1988, it was the death of Enzo Ferrari. In 2009, we have a similar situation. If you use addition, and take Schumacher’s neck injury + Massa’s eyeball boinged at Hungary + sacking of Luca Badoer = roughly [...]

2009 Belgian Grand Prix – Kimi is King

4th win for Kimi Raikkonen at the legendary Spa-Francorchamps circuit. Masterful.

Speaking of Kimi Raikkonen, Peter Windsor really hates this guy. Or anyone who dares to harm his lovechild, Lewis Hamilton. All butthurt, he blamed Kimi Raikkonen’s tiny off at Les Combs for Hamilton’s DNF. Calling for stewards to investigate. This guy is a joke. Yet [...]

2009 Belgian GP Qualifying – Fisichella on Pole

What the hell is Giancarlo Fisichella doing on pole? Everyone’s surprised. Even me. Although less so, when you consider he’s always gone well in shit cars at Spa. 2nd in 1997 driving the Jordan-Peugeot. 3rd in 2001 driving the Benetton. Either way you cut it, Vijay Mallya is still a douche.
Jenson Button is over the [...]

2009 European Grand Prix

First thing’s first: McLaren is an embarassment from the top down.

Heikki Kovalainen’s seat is gone. Team tell him to raise his game. He nearly got pole, but made a mistake. Started on front row. Finished fourth. Gone. Robert Kubica, a man looking to be in a desperate situation, will be more appreciative of that competitive [...]

Michael Schumacher to Buyout Kimi Raikkonen’s Ferrari Contract for 2010?

It seems to be the most logical solution. Kimi Raikkonen’s contract averages $51 million per year. Schumacher has basically made $1 BILLION from being in Formula 1. And you know he’s surrounded himself with the best investment people, so you can count on his worth only going up. Schumacher can buy Kimi’s contract out with [...]

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